„Meeting the Fockers“: Quiz I

Intro

I woke up at 5am to write this. I had a meeting last night, with someone important. The family.

It is one thing if you are in a country as a tourist. But it is different if you are going to stay there long enough to be asked for a family meeting. Or even further, to „meet the fockers“ (that is, to meet the family of your pacar (– to those, who haven’t seen the movie)). What’ you gonna say there? „Saya tidak tahu itu harus dilaporkan?“ (I did not know it has to be declared?) No!

There are plenty of books to learn useful phrases as a tourist (and Lonely Planet’s phrasebook was funny enough to get me started), but their common problem is – if you study from those, you will probably sound like some Dutchman.

In an Indonesian family there are usually much more than just 2 people. There may be 4, or maybe 8 or more, and the parents are not so old as you are used in Europe. They are vital and smart enough to realize who you (I) really are (am).

So there I was, sitting in a ruang tamu, trying to act normal. Ibu of the house was serving makanan and showed her interest in any possible way. While He, the father, was probably thinking: “Is he penjudi (a gambler) or not?” Not to mention the two brothers and sisters, some of them sudah menikah (already married), but none of them were living together with a bule. It was a new situation for everyone, including myself.

 

And there were The Questions:p

You may choose now, what would you say by yourself:

1 Kenapa kamu merencanakan pindah ke indonesia? (Why are you planning to move to Indonesia?)

–          Karena orang orang disini sangat ramah
–          Karena saya tidak bekerja di Eropa
–          Setelah saya melihat beberapa negara, saya berfikir ini lah negera dimana saya ingin tinggal di sisa hidup saya
–          Karena saya suka sama putri anda

2 Pernah berfikir pindah agama? Apakah kamu sudah melakukan sunat? (Have you thought about changing religion? Have you had circumcision?)

–          Tentu saja
–          Tidak boleh
–          Jika kami akan menikah di negara luar, mungkinkah saya tidak perlu untuk pindah agama?
–          Eee.. tolong jelaskan apa itu sunat?

3 Benarkah, biarawan disana suka minum bir? Apakah semua orang minum di sana? (Is it true that monks like drinking beer? Are all the people drinking there?)

–          Oh, itu biarawan saja yang suka minum itu. The word ´bir´ originates from ´biarawan´ :p
–          Iya, dan karena biarawan minum itu, saya pikir gak ada salah jika saya minum itu juga
–          Kadang-kadang
–          Saya akan berhenti setelah pernikahan

4 Sebelumnya sudah berapa kali pacaran? (~How many girlfriends have you had before?)

–          Beberapa kali, tetapi pertama kali di sini
–          Saya masih kecewa dengan hubungan terakhir saya di Eropa dan mau melupakan itu
–          Tak pernah
–          Saya cerai

5 Apa kesalahan besar yang telah kamu lakukan dalam hidup kamu? (What is the biggest mistake you have ever made?)

–          Pernikahan terakhir saya
–          Saya tidak ada kesalahan yang besar, walaupun kesahalan kecil saya banyak
–          Seberapa besar?
–          Saya tidak tahu kesalahan terbesar saya tetapi saya tahu keputusan terbaik saya. Yaitu di sini.

6 Kamu ingin anak berapa? (How many children do you want?)

–          Eee, kami akan melihat
–          Dua untuk kami berdua – jadinya empat
–          Nenek saya telah anak kedelapan, makanya…
–          Saya anak tunggal, jadi…

To be continued…

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